the dreams in which i'm dying

hello.
i want to talk about dreams. often i've had de ja vu experiences. this can be simply explained however. first, you only remember striking experiences, not the hundreds of times that your dreams did not correlate to your experience.

the second point i want to make is of personal interest. most people have dreams that are interesting, fantastic things. mine, however, are not. they are bland and boring. i dream about a dining room with cheesy fake flowers. i dream about standard types of people. i dream about everyday conversations. this is why i often have these experiences. because the vagaries of my dreams fit so well with ordinary life.

this experience, is consistent with another emotional experience, or more appropriately, eccentricity that i have. i don't feel things in a standard or typical way. i'm not excited, i'm not even really sad. i'm always kind of neutral. i'm pretty good at imitating some emotions, but i'm poor at taking good news or bad news. this has resulted in some unfortunate experiences.

this is my next goal, to learn how to seem excited at good news or compliments. then fewer people will have their feelings hurt in personal exchanges.

i apologize for this.